Big A$$ Beaver attack...aka...when animals attack the helmet/lycra clad folk on spinny things

Was that a long enough title or what? So no beavers were involved, but due to my friend who will remain nameless (but is linked in my side bar) we will say the "beagle" in my story sounds so much more exciting when it is a big a$$ BEAVER! Yes, all the Primus people unite and think about Winona's beaver for a moment. Yes, that was lovely can I tell my tale now?

Okay, are you back? Really, because I need you to listen. Here we go...

This summer has been weird: I attract animals.

At the very beginning of summer I did a big ride with some friends and we almost hit a DEER. It just strolled out into our path, thank goodness we were paying attention and going slow enough to see it and slow down for it to meander across the road.

Tues: on my ride a ginourmous toad (that we thought was a rock) jumped into our path on the road barely missing us on a downhill.

Wed: I almost crash, slam on my breaks (going 39mph downhill) smoke flying, back tire fishtailing, but again everything fine. <---no animals, just thought I'd slip in a scary personal moment.

Today,

Mara and I are chatting riding the country road and all of a sudden a really mad fat Beagle comes chasing me trying to either bite my ankle or my rear wheel. I started yelling NO NO NO, BAD DOG NO!!!! Which did NOTHING so I had to out pedal him. We laughed about that even though I was shaking.

THEN,

In the last few miles of my ride I was in between groups. I was trying to catch up with this fast group about 1/4 mile in front of me when OMG A HUGE HORSE ON MY RIGHT STARTS GALLOPING AND SNARLING FULL SPEED TOWARD HIS "FENCE" AND.JUMPS.OUT.OF. HIS.YARD AND INTO THE ROAD LITERALLY 3-4 car lengths in front of me and is going all sketchy crazy running up and down the road at me. I kept my pee in...no I did not soak my diaper spandex today and anyways I had on my thin shorts so it would have been apparent. Pshhah, lycra hate-ahs!

I get off my bike and head toward a blackberry bush (because those little thorns will scare away the big ASS horse. Every time I would start to try to get back on my bike it seemed he/she whatever big a$$ horse got mad and seemed to gallop at me.

So, I tapped into my horse whisperer mode<---really I have one and I start saying softly "it's okay, whoa horsey, calm down, whoa, it's okay" and it started to calm down and at least not come rushing me.

Finally, (like 5 mins after the break out), the owner comes out and gets the crazy horse and puts it back into the same area that the thing just busted out of!!! As he mumbles how some kids must have spooked him angry.gif OMG if you have a sketchy horse that is easily spooked, please keep him/her/whatever big a$$ horse locked up dufuss!

Thanks for listening.

I need to report him for being such a negligent owner. People/kids/cars/bikes could be injured for cryin' out loud.